Kenny is a film in the style of “The Office”, dead pan, documentary about an Australian plumber in the portaloo industry.

If, like me, you love toilet humour then this will be up your street. Mr TP and I have just watched it and couldn’t stop laughing at comments like:

“there’s a smell that’s going to out last religion.”

and the problem of a blocked toilet due to a
“2 inch arse but 1 inch pipe work”.

There is a trailer on the website: Kenny the Movie.
This film was so good, if you like that sort of thing, that I just have to let you know about it.

It is that time of year again. 

Eventually it will get so cold that people will turn their heating on.  Or at least try to.  Each year Mr T.P. has to explain to some people that he cannot service a boiler if it does not work.  Like servicing a car.

I am assuming it will get that cold eventually, I’ve never known November to be so warm.  Perhaps the days of central heating repairs are numbered and Mr TP should re-train in the field of Air Conditioning? 

What to do if your boiler has broken? 

1. Don’t try to fix it yourself, unless you are qualified AND on the gas safe register.
2. Don’t call Mr TP.  He only want to see them if he can be paid without having to actually diagnose problems, replace parts and get it all working again. Smart! 

He says the best people to call are either:

1. The person who installed it OR
2. the manufacturer. 

 The manufacturers of many common boilers have their own teams of well trained engineers who drive around in vans stocked with spare parts and can often replace broken parts cheaper price than a local Plumber/ Heating Engineer.

You may have noticed a lack of words being added to this blog in recent months.  Well, 14 months ago we had twins.  I’ve just about managed to avoid a complete nervous breakdown but one or two things have suffered: one being my creativity two being my spare time.  I hope to return to regular blogging and woo back my audience, we’ll see.

I’m not going to write about twins here, but will do so here.

They got Margate so wrong on the Apprentice (BBC 1) last night – hardly their fault.  They had less than  48 hours and they do not know the town – it is not all doom and gloom, I think there are some marketing opportunities for our area.

It is not a question of who might come to Margate but why would they come? 

Yes it has sandy beaches – as can be found all around the British coast line. So what is unique that could really attract any people to Margate?

See Margate through children’s eyes indeed – what a load of RUBBISH! If you know Margate today, then you know what I mean. Apart from the beach need I point out there is no fun fair, there is very little to entertain a family.  The Museum in the old town was fascinating – BUT closed due to lack of funding.      

The mini golf place is excellent, but is not even within view of the Main sands,  you need   to know where to find it.  Walk west, along the seafront, to Westbrook.

If you asked me – re brand Margate I would say you need to focus on 2 things:

1.  Day trippers.  At the last minute you find the day is sunny, Margate is ideally located, with in 2 hours travel time of about 10 million people!

The biggest selling point is probably that you walk straight out of the station and you are facing the main beach.

If lots of families were in Margate with children on a rainy day just what would they do? (Not even a cinema unless you travel to Westwood).  And if they had come to Margate on holiday where would they stay?  

The lack of hotels was obviously not made clear to the apprentices.  There is a Travel Inn next to the station.  The interesting Walpole Bay Hotel and the Palm Court Smith Hotel.  Inland a little, at Westwood, there is a small Travel Lodge.

2. Short break, weekend away crowd – adults that is.  Hen nights, stags, dirty weekends etc.. What Margate can boast is lots of bars and night clubs as well as 2 casinos in the vicinity.  I think there are a few reasonable places to eat there too. 

I don’t want to be negative, but I will be.        

In the 1990’s with crowds of friends we would travel to Margate for a day out. If I lived in London now (and was still in my 20’s) I would be unlikely to think of any reason to choose Margate for a day trip.  Brighton and even Hastings would hold more appeal – there is more to do.  Coming in to Kent, I can’t see any reason why not stop at Whitstable or Herne Bay ( they are nearer) or even go to Dover or Folkestone.

well, almost.  We are under siege.

In the last couple of days we have suffered an ant invasion in the Tara Plumbing strong hold. 

Our solid front door held up against their battering ram; our window locks were not picked by the nimble little ant fingers; and we did not fall for their Trojan horse trick.  Nevertheless, whilst my back was turned for a minute they seem to have tunnelled their way. 

I have retaliated with all the weapons at my disposal but it is not clear who is winning, I am bigger, stronger and with much greater fire power.  I  am not for killing mammals to eat them, but ant attack in my home is another matter…

Why is this suddenly happening, does anyone know?  Is it happening to others?  Mr Tara Plumbing thinks it may be to do with mating behaviour.  How our love life should affect the local ant population, however, I’m really not sure.

Last week Jane Allen, who shops in Birchington, wrote:

The divider of shopping etiquette is not as she stated.

With great joy this week I read the reply from Mark Goddard of Minis Road, Birchington, it is this I would urge you to read in full. He is a man with too much time on his hands to write about the trivia in life; he explains most eloquently why etiquette should suggest that when in a queue one is not responsible for what goes on behind the queuer. The queuer is merely responsible for ensuring appropriate space (barrier) between herself and the person in front.

If there is something trivial to argue about there will be blogs and websites dedicated to the subject, so I did a little search. The www is almost quiet on this matter. I did find a very entertaining blog, however, in which the author explains that the rules of etiquette are one should put the divider in front of your own shopping but the are strict rules governing your response if the person infront places the divider for you:

The easy to clean smooth surface of pan and seat are quite delicious.  I never thought I could get so excited about a toilet.

But I hate cleaning and the last model was a nightmare of curves, corners, nooks & crannies – all for dust, hair and bacteria to congregate and hide out.

Our new loo.

Roca Giralda

On the web there are hundreds (perhaps thousands) of contributions to the debate. Not much of a debate, however, as the dissenters seem to a a tiny minority, but in this free world they are entitled to continue in their own idiosyncratic way.

I am talking about those who hang the toilet roll the wrong way round.

Hung the correct way most of us find it easier to tear what we need and there is some argument that less toilet paper is used/wasted, therefore, this saves money and is the most environmentally friendly way of hanging the toilet paper.

The correct way is perfectly illustrated here:

I had to search hard to find some explanation/ justifications for hanging it the WRONG way: One commentator claims that it is easier to pull/tear sheets away with just one hand; others have claimed that the paper is less likely to all unravel over the floor.

What is this unravelling problem? It is not one I’m familiar with. I guess gravity must work in a strange way around their homes. In fact, it could be that their toilet roll is by coincidence aligned a particular sharp curve in the space-time continuum.

Is there a limit to a healthy interest in toilet paper – I found a site where people review different makes – Andrex had the most reviews – Who would read them, would you?

I mentioned this to my mum. Like me she buys which ever is on special offer – 3 for 2 or 12 rolls for the price of 9… In fact, if there is no special offer I’m confused by the choice and so don’t buy any! Any way, mum told me her hubby has definite toilet roll preferences with explanation which are far too detailed.

Read reviews if you like: www.ciao.co.uk/Toilet_Tissue_5034246_5

A vegan child in Scotland was found to suffer Rickets associated with vitamin D deficiency a few months ago – which caused quite a storm in a teacup among a few.

A recent study has found that about 50% of children may be getting not enough vit D – to the extent that bone growth may be suffering – I wonder if this will get the same kind of news coverage.

Some very ill informed members of the public posted comments to the Timesonline.com about veg*ns – that this was further evidence that eating meat and drinking milk is essential to our diet – and mums like myself, who don’t, should probably have our children taken into care – for child neglect.

I say ill informed because meat does not contain vit. D and dairy products do not naturally contain vit D. In this country Vit D has been added to milk – as a precaution – for about the past 50 years.

The main source of Vitamin D is from the reaction of the sunlight on our skin – I don’t want to get too technical, suffice to say it is just not like the vitamins we eat. In the summer months in England we require just 10 minutes exposure to a small area of our bodies. Fortunately, we do store vit D – which is just as well – because in those months when our shadows are longer than our actual bodies then the sunlight is not intensive enough to bring about the chemical changes…

Basically we can’t get enough sun light in winter – more so the further north we are – so it is vital to get out in the sun for a short time each day in the summer months.

My conclusion – in general the western lifestyle is not healthy: it includes limited exercise, not enough walking, too much staying indoors playing with our high tech equipment, and really poor diet.

The typical diet of children is quite shocking: including limited fruit and veg., large amounts of sugary soft drinks and high salt/sugar convenience foods.

There is no reason to think a veg*n is going to be more or less healthy than any other person in our society.

Link: www.wddty.com/03363800371776507641/vitamin-d-half-of-all-children-are-deficient.html

Next year Corgi registration is not going to be a requirement for gas engineers – not a lot of people know this.

Corgi registration has been a legal requirement for gas safety for more than 10 years – most people know Corgi registration is the thing to look for and Corgi are the body to address gas concerns.

In order to be Corgi registered every individual has to sit and re-sit exams – practical and written every five years which are run by approved centres (not Corgi) – each individual has their own unique number and ID card which will detail the exact gas items which they are deemed competent in.

A company/individual must register annually and any of their work can be inspected randomly by a Corgi inspector.

Ok – the gas engineers must still be registered but under a new scheme. Only 7 months to go and here is what we don’t know:

• What will the scheme be called?
• What logo will it have?
• Will those currently registered with Corgi continue to keep the same registration number under the new scheme?

What we do know is that a company called Capita will run the registration scheme – for a while at least.

We know that a new ‘BRAND’ is going to be developed which will be independent of the company that runs it. Whereas Corgi is a company that ‘own’ the ‘Corgi’ brand. Corgi will continue to exist.

The implications of this change are massive both to registered gas engineers and to the public.

From my point of view: For most companies we need to be prepared 12 months or so in advance because of the financial implications – our Corgi registration details are on our letterheads, our sign written vehicles, and in our adverts – there are legal requirements about these.

E.g. advertising is often prepared 12 months in advance – you know how long you keep the Yellow Pages – you may not realise that the copy for those adverts has been submitted a long time before publication.

For the public I think it is going to be very confusing and for a while it will be difficult to be confident that the person you employ is in fact registered with the correct body as we do not know what they will be called – telephone number or website. Can this all be put in place with sufficient publicity in such a short time?

Recipe for disaster?

This is happening because the Health & Safety Executive HSE are in charge of the whole thing and they thought it would be a good idea – back in 2006!

Why not more publicity?

You can’t blame Corgi – it is not their responsibility – here is what they say:

www.trustcorgi.com/news/corgi/HSEDecision.htmx

As for the HSE they say everything has been detailed on their website. I’m sure we all regularly look there to see if there is any important changes we should know about:

www.hse.gov.uk/gas/domestic/bidder.htm

And read more here:

http://home-plumbing.suite101.com/article.cfm/the_new_gas_safe_register_in_great_britain

Your average new bathroom will cost £7,700, but will add only £2,892 to the value of your property – according to something I read the other day:

http://timesbusiness.typepad.com/money_weblog/2008/07/the-10-best-l-1.html

I’m not sure where the figure comes from but it sounds about consistent with out experience an average bathroom does cost about £7K+, but many people asking for quotes only expect to pay £2,892! I know how they feel – both Mr T.P. and I are often amazed at how much it might cost to buy some of the bathroom fitting which he provides. Such as hundreds of £££ just for a shower door – not even including the tray you need to stand in!

A quote for a complete new bathroom include tiles; electrics (which must be certified) – ventilation & lights; flooring; possibly plastering, new door & windows; as well as plumbing.

Only the last week Mr Tara Plumbing completed a lovely bathroom installation – it looked like something from a catalogue/ showroom. The customer said she’s be showing everyone! But she added – don’t expect any work via word of mouth referrals – ‘my friends are all too poor’.Such a familiar story when working in Thanet.

Those make over shows on TV give the illusion that an entire house could be almost rebuilt for £7,700! Well, not by professional tradespeople who need to earn a living…

Anyway – what about that article – will it only add £3k value to your home.  Common sense suggests that if you are only looking to add value or sell  your home then the upgrades need to be in proportion to the typical price of properties in your area.